Jan4, 2005- 2005 is gonna suck

Yep, it's suck city from here on out. Let me explain, no, wait, we don't have time, let me sum up:

I cat-sat for a family friend (without a good thank you but we'll get to that later). This chick has 3 cats. Two smallish, cat-like creatures who sit looking pretty and I'm sure are like your average cat (they are cuddles and fluffy...oooh, yeah, imagination city!) and one huge beast that is only classified as a cat because they haven't found the missing link between it and a sabertooth tiger. Seriously, the cat weighs at least 40lbs and is bigger than your average boston terrier (a medium sized dog). No one would believe it unless they saw it but it is a monster of a beast. A lonely beast too since it no doubt realized after the first day that its inferior cat companions were dumb as posts. And this big moster is VERY smart, like, it might share some genes with dolphins. It's certainly slippery with its escape attempts. Oh, and btw, the cat's name is "stupid" so you can imagine my delight running up and down the hallway of the apartment yelling "here, Stupid, come here, Stupid, come back inside, you asshole.....ok, I'm telling a fib, I also dropped the "f" bomb a few times to the horror of the elderly neighbours. But you try getting the smartest cat-beast in the world to come inside without calling it a few names. I dare you.

Anyway, The cat was really loud about wanting to be snuggled and since my knees were a bit stiff I bent at the waist to pick up the 40+lb cat. I realize, in retrospect, that I am an idiot. Perhaps even "stupid" myself. I actually heard, as well as felt, the crack when I hoisted up Stupid. I immeditely let go (followed by 30 seconds of the cat trying to get a grip on my shirt so as not to fall into the waterbowl) and almost burst into tears. I walked home very carefully (only a 10 minute walk) and lay down on my side. I think at some point during the day I was crying for Peter to kill me and end the pain. He drugged me (hey, did you know that you can take 4 extra strength Tylenols?!) and I slept off some of the craziness for a bit. I was much better on Sunday, a bit stiff but not bad. Then, after sitting all day yesterday I was in LOTS of pain last night!!! I had to take a hot shower and take more Tylenol just to get a couple of hours' sleep. Yay me.

Anyway, here's a rundown of the rest of my holiday:

23rd-company party. So many people told me I looked nice that I'm thinking I look like a real skeeze most of the time at work. I had fun and left sometime after 9pm.

24th-family, yay, we had our Christmas. We were supposed to eat at 3:30pm, we instead ate after 5. We opened gifts. Like Alisha, we take turns. I got some nice stuff and some not so nice stuff. I'm not real big on "stuff" anyway. Fought with my mom about me going home to sleep and had to tell her that I brought cab fare if no one would drive me. Went home, showered and slept surrounded by cats.

25th-woke up, spat out a hairball, got ready for day 2 with my family. This time to open stockings and go to church with my mom. Oooops, I let it slip to the choir directrice (a former teacher) that I wasn't having a Catholic wedding. What, a NON-Catholic wedding?!?! Quick, all hands on deck, this is an emergency, do you need a priest, we'll find one and get him to marry you, don't worry, anything to save a soul. Feeling much more at ease now that I know that I will burn in hell for an unholy union and not just for having wild, unmarried sex and lying to my mom (not related, not usually anyway). It's comforting to know that no matter what I do, my punishment can't get worse. Be warned, I can kill people now.

Anyway, after leaving the choir loft and getting dropped off home I hopped in the shower and got ready to deliver presents at the hospital with Melissa. Realized that nothing was clean. I had to wear a J. Lo-esque velour sweatsuit. Ask Melissa, I was quite the Gina. Then her dad, as she's dropping me off home, corrects me when I say that it's my house. He says, you mean you "rent" the house (wtf?!?! I COULDN'T have heard right? Why would he say that?) and I'm like "no, I own the house" and Melissa tells him that I bought it. Anyway, he was a bit grumpy due to hurting his arm. And melting in a Santa suit. But that was weird!!

Dec 26:day 3 of the mom visits. This time I'm picked up and driven home by family friends. This is a party for them at my mom's house. Boring, boring, boring. Glad to be home. Woke up at 3am, couldn't sleep so I cleaned the house so when Peter arrived the next day it wasn't too awful.

Dec 27: Peter comes home at noon bearing gifts from his family. I liked them. Too many to count. I was spoiled. We go to my mom's (#4!!!!) and she has some gifts for Peter. Fun. He gets some good stuff (I told her what he'd like) and we stay until 11pm when we finally get out and go home and SLEEP!!

Dec 28: Hmmm, WTF did we do? We must have done something, just not too sure what.

Dec 29 and 30: Peter works all day, I sleep and read. Tres interesting. BTW, I had to go to the library on the 30th so I read 8 books between Dec 23 and Dec 30. I congratulate myself!

Dec 31: day of the skunk. If 2005 began badly, 2004 ended pretty stinky too. Seriously. Our house got hit by a skunk at 6:30am. Now, I don't mind the odd wafting odour as a skunk passes by, I actually like it. Reminds me of being a kid in the country. Anyway, being in a house that a skunk has sprayed near is NOT cool. We were close to vomitting. Peter had to work so he got up, had a shower and left. I finally dropped off to sleep just after 10am because the smell kept me awake. At 10:30 Peter came home. Apparently he had still smelled skunk while on the subway and assumed it was stuck in his nose. When a woman turned around in the copy room at work and said "do you smell something" he wasn't so sure it was in his head. He ran to a friend's cube and said "smell me" and the guy said he couldn't b/c all he could smell was skunk. Peter wrote a quick note to his boss saying he had to leave and he'd explain later. How embarrassing. We got rid of the worst of the smell and our clothes have been aired and cleaned. If you smell a skunky odour though, please let me know. I don't want to be the office stinky guy.

Jan 1: Incident with cat. Let's drop that. Although, just for the record, who asks a family friend who you aren't super close to to cat-sit when your brother and his wife live closer to your house? 'Nuff said.

Jan 2: Happily not in so much pain, the day just flew by.

Jan 3: I had to come to work. I think you know how I felt about that. Only by chance did I have food with me. But no pass card. Although I did spot my passcard over the holiday, I just forget where I saw it.

Jan 4: today. Today sucks. Tomorrow will probably suck too. In fact, I'm forcasting a suckfest until Friday, 5pm. Make that 5:30pm, TTC sucks too.